Romance Scams in Australia — How to Spot a Fake Profile Before You Lose Everything

Romance scams are among the most emotionally devastating scams in Australia. The ACCC's Scamwatch reports losses of over $40 million annually from romance scams — and the actual figure is estimated to be three to five times higher because many victims are too embarrassed to report, or do not recognise they have been scammed until long after the relationship has ended. These are not impulsive crimes — they are long-term, calculated, professional operations.

How Romance Scammers Operate

Romance scammers create convincing profiles on dating apps, Facebook, and Instagram using stolen photos of attractive, successful-looking people — often military officers, engineers, doctors, or successful businesspeople. They may claim to be Australian but currently working overseas — on an oil rig, serving in the military, working on a major infrastructure project in a developing country. This conveniently explains why they cannot meet in person and creates a ready reason for future financial requests. The relationship develops over weeks or months with daily contact — good morning messages, declarations of love, detailed conversations about their life and yours. The financial request comes only after a deep emotional connection has been established.

The Financial Request Pattern

The initial financial request is almost always for something understandable and relatively small — a medical emergency, a customs problem releasing a package, plane tickets to finally visit you. The scammer always has a convincing reason why they cannot access their own funds. Once a payment is made, requests continue and typically escalate in amount and urgency. Victims who have paid once are often too emotionally and financially committed to stop — particularly because the scammer provides enough intermittent positive contact to maintain hope.

The Red Flags

• They cannot meet in person — always a compelling excuse
• They profess intense love very quickly — often within the first week
• They want to move communication off the dating platform quickly — to WhatsApp or email where the platform cannot monitor
• They are always overseas, offshore, or in transit
• They have a compelling reason they urgently need money
• Reverse image search on their profile photo shows the image belongs to someone else
• Their life story has inconsistencies when you ask detailed questions

What to Do If You Suspect a Romance Scam

Stop all payments immediately — once you stop paying, most scammers will move on quickly. Do a reverse image search on their profile photos using Google Images or TinEye. Report the profile to the platform. Report the scam to Scamwatch at scamwatch.gov.au. Contact IDCARE (idcare.org) for specialist support. And speak with someone you trust — the shame associated with romance scams is common but undeserved. These are professional criminals who have refined their techniques through thousands of attempts.

If You Suspect Someone You Know Is Being Scammed

Approaching a family member or friend you suspect is in a romance scam requires care. Victims are often emotionally invested in the relationship and may react defensively to suggestions that it is not genuine. Avoid direct attacks on the relationship — instead, express concern for the person's wellbeing and ask questions that prompt reflection. Share information about romance scams generally, perhaps referencing a news story, and offer to check the person's profile photos using a reverse image search together. If money has already been sent, the most important immediate action is to contact the bank to report the transfers. The ACCC and IDCARE both provide resources for supporting someone who may be in a romance scam situation.

Rebuilding After a Romance Scam

The emotional damage of a romance scam — the grief for a relationship that was never real, combined with financial loss and the shame of having been deceived — can be significant and lasting. IDCARE (idcare.org or 1800 595 160) provides specialised support for scam victims including counselling referrals. Many victims benefit from peer support groups where others who have experienced similar scams share recovery experiences. Recovery is genuine and possible — the shame is undeserved, and reaching out for help is the most important step.